Let’s bust some myths about sexual harassment

Sexual harassment is widespread. Yet, there’s a great deal of misinformation surrounding it.

Let’s bust some myths about sexual harassment.

Myth no.1: Sexual harassment only happens to women

Truth:  Men and boys are also sexually harassed, including gay and bisexual men. The nature of this crime is such that harassers often choose people whom they perceive as weak or vulnerable to attack. Harassers single out people over whom they believe they can assert power, for instance persons with disabilities. For this reason, anyone, regardless of their sex, gender identity or sexual orientation can be a victim or perpetrator of sexual harassment. Sexual harassment may also occur between members of the same sex. Though, statistically speaking, more women than men are victims of sexual harassment.

Myth no.2: The best thing you can do about sexual harassment is to ignore it

Truth: Sexual harassment will not simply go away if you ignore it. In fact, ignoring harassment may have the opposite effect on the perpetrator. If a victim does nothing about being abused, the harasser is likely to feel they are able to get away with it. In such circumstances, the perpetrator may even begin to believe that his behaviour is acceptable and continue abusing the victim. Even if a victim is able to ignore and leave a hostile situation, the harasser may feel more confident about seeking other victims.

Myth no.3: Women provoke harassment by the way they behave and dress

Truth: If this were true, sexual assaults on children, men or modestly dressed women would never take place. Saying that the girl should have covered her legs or that she should have had the sense not to go out with her friends at night wrongly places the responsibility of the harasser’s actions on the victim. Such thinking not only tries to rationalise the horrifying actions of an abuser but also creates the notion that men are inherently aggressive and unruly beings who lack self-control. The idea that ‘boys will be boys’ or that ‘she was asking for it’ normalise sexual abuse. Think for a moment – can you ever justify forcing yourself on someone just because she was wearing clothes that you thought were ‘revealing’?

Myth no.4: Most sexual harassment complaints are fabricated

Truth: Although false charges can occur, they are rare. In fact, victims rarely file complaints even when they are justified in doing so. As things go, filing a formal complaint can be extremely difficult for victims for a variety of reasons. Most victims are too scared to file a complaint for fear that the authorities won’t believe them or that they won’t do anything about it. They also fear that their attacker will retaliate and hit back. Moreover, it can be quite upsetting for a victim to retell and relive the episodes of their abuse. As a result, sexual harassment is rather under-reported. Truth is, a man is more likely to be sexually assaulted by another man than he is to be falsely accused of sexual harassment by a woman.

Myth no.5: Sexual harassment is just another term for casual flirting, where people are ‘having a bit of fun’

Truth: Sexual harassment is not flirting and it’s definitely not ‘fun’ for the victim. The main difference between sexual harassment and flirting is that flirting is welcome. On the other hand, sexual harassment creates a hostile environment for victims and makes them feel unsafe around the abuser. Many go through severe psychological and health-related troubles. Victims can be terrified to continue going to their school or workplace, and may be forced to leave their jobs to avoid further harassment.

Myth no.6: Women who say ‘no’ actually mean ‘yes’

Truth: Contrary to how Bollywood has presented this issue, when women say ‘no’ they really do mean ‘no’. If a woman declines your romantic invitation or shows signs of not being comfortable with or interested in your advances, the best approach is to accept her lack of interest and move on. Not taking no for an answer and persisting with your requests even after she has turned down your offer will constitute sexual harassment.

Myth no.7: Sexual harassment requires touching

Truth: The reality is that sexual harassment can take many forms. It can be verbal like asking someone for sexual favours, making unwelcome comments that are sexual in nature or spreading offensive rumours. In fact, a lot of sexual harassment is in the form of distasteful remarks about someone’s appearance, unwanted or sexualised compliments, and sexist or sexually explicit jokes. Sexual harassment can also be non-verbal like forcing someone to watch pornography or directly or indirectly showing obscene photographs. It can include offensive conduct like following or stalking someone or making obscene facial expressions or other gestures that have sexual suggestions. Sexual harassment also includes display or circulation of sexually offensive or derogatory images and messages in an office environment by emails, text messages, etc.

[Disclaimer: This post is an attempt to raise awareness of laws affecting Indian women. The post is only for general information and is not meant to substitute legal advice.]

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6 thoughts on “Let’s bust some myths about sexual harassment

  1. Such articles are like rays of hope, and will give confidence to people who think they are at the dead end of the situation. A very good start, Kanika. Keep it going.

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